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Vent Here

06 June 2026 04:00

Hey Unihorse 🦄
Hide my Identity
I need to vent
People this is going to be a loooonng one. So sit back and get your popcorn 😂😂
Disclaimer: this is not a teenage post. I am a full grown adult with my stuff going on 😭 Mndnew endezi miyachemalkegn? When I don’t talk to him, I forget him. When I talk to him, I start thinking about him and I want to be his wife. But my heart doesn’t flutter or anything. I don’t yearn him and all. I just think “wifeeee me uppp”. He is very mature for his age, even though he is younger than me and it is funny how I I usually get the icks when they are younger 😅 He is caring. He’s a hustler. He would be a really great dad. He uses all his resources and connections to build his future. He has this dominant aura and a good decision-making skills that makes me actually want to submit and follow him, which is crazy because I am someone who doesn’t really want to be led and usually insists on doing things my own way. He could even guide me religiously. The fact that he is physically my type to the T doesn’t help as well 😏 devil be testing me left and right.

So far, we have very good chemistry as friends but THIS IS THE CATCH!! I just feel like he’s been associated with multiple women and is potentially a playboy. I live in a different city and I strictly told him I don’t want to do calls often (maybe me protecting myself 😭) so we talk every now and then.

Now this is the tea people. He came to see me in my city and Dedeb me said he can stay in my house which I regret so much. He didnt know anyone so was saving him from hotel expenses. Denez me I swear. I wish I could go back and slap the shit out of her. Anyways we had dinner, enjoyed our dessert and opened movie. He told me to come closer to cuddle. Yeap I fall for that— and rightfully so 🤭 During cuddling, he tried to get me into the mood, and unfortunately, we slept together that day. I was kinda shocked because he came prepared with a condom and everything, so it got me thinking—he must have come with this exact mindset. He was sweet right after—cleaning me and my sweat, kissing my forehead and all. He even suggested giving me a shower. What the hell? I was just like 😳😳 but I don't know... that’s low-key the Playboy Manual(I have a bunch of guy friends so I know the drill). Our relationship never became awkward after that, but I keep thinking: if he did that with me when we are not in a relationship, he would probably do it with other women, too.
I even thought is he also playing me for opportunities like these or does he actually value our friendship and that was an accident. I mean yall we talk for at least 3 hours on phone. He even stayed with me the whole night on phone because I was supposed to be awake until morning for something and he was worried my sleep would win me over. He listens to my opinion and put action on it. Like would he go this far if he was playing me?
Anyways, after that night, I told him I hated myself so much for lowering my standards, because that was my first ever situation where I slept with someone outside of a relationship. He told me he doesn’t see me any less and didn't lose any respect for me, which I appreciated. We just decided to keep it at the back of our heads and move on with our friendship. It is pretty much casual, and we’ve never had any intimacy since that night because I was avoiding to meet him in person.

Uffffff okay I am done. I feel light now. It would be great if I hear other’s opinion too. Do you think I should cut off this relationship? Is it cancerous? Will it keep me from allowing other people in? Is it good to let him know how I think of him? I can’t really tell him I love him because I don’t think I do. It is just DEEEEEEPPP respect but if he asked me if I want to be his partner, I would say yes 😂😂😂 I don’t know yall, he is a true man. Leave me alone. what is this feeling anyways?

#Adult
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