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Vent Here

21 апреля 2023 04:01

Hey Unihorse 🦄
Hide my Identity
I need to vent
Am 23 yrs female and am kind of confused with my life since I started realizing things in my own
Am deceitful and also innocent, am unfaithful and also loyal somehow have many reason and all to not live to my true self but ik all this r not agud reason to be deceitful but somehow am living such kind of life
Shorty let me put what bring me here to vent is for a couple of months I have been dating some guy we kind of have the same vibe but different perspective abt life but we both luved difference n tried to accept that as I said am deceitful on some of my want always had aproblem on living the real me so I put a shell for my self n lie just to fit in with him all was good
Till my insecurities win over I was totally honest abt it I guess that was alit but harsh on him tho we handle that but the real problem came up because of ne being depressed n wanting him to be with me with silence but can’t can’t relate to that he thought I was losing feelings I tried to tell him that wasn’t the case I thought he understood that and he asked for a space for sometime till he made up his mind n know what he wants from me I said okay but meantime me n my ex started talking on social media n I thought I always have feelings for but the truth is i just can’t forget my current bf the space in between keeps killing me
So my ex reaching out to me once again makes me realize n be sure abt my feelings
So I asked to the stop the space things and talk we did that but he asked for a break up instead of trying to fight for it I said okay and just leave things as they were cause we was pushing me n I have to accept that
Me n my ex r still talking but just as Normal ppls do
After a 4 month ngr after the breakup he asked for a second chance and we met n talk abt it I told him clearly what I want from him I can see clearly my thoughts was little bit hard for him but I agreed to give him asecond just but within two day after that he texted me in the middle of nowhere n said he don’t deserve my second chance n for the first Time in my life am going to see through my self because of u so bye I hope u will find ur soul met all I was feeling was confusion so I just read it and just kept quite n just ignored the thing that happend
After weeks form this confusing I met a guy on TG and we started talking we were so compatible through our talks then we met in person n dame it was so gud we were compatible like in everything the only difference was our sex drive still we have the same kind of mindset abt it but I had problem in showing or reflecting that I new I had a problem in that n that would mess up the thing
N we had our first encounter but as I said it messed everything up we were trying to feel the vibe but na we tried it but he cum to early diffrent ngr lemokir asbin in the time gn no everything was so bad the second round layi we said he cum early is when he imagined somebody else instead n I was so sad to hear that n I said sry for pushing him till this point he wanted to protect him self because me saying all that was to manipulate him , that am emotionally driven kind of person but the thing was so touching for me I told him to leave he kept trying to make me believe that it is as it is ngr gn I was offended I always think sexual incompatible thing r solved through communication n understanding it’s true it was to early for such expectations because we still wasn’t eachother comfort zone
I don’t know what to think after that incident I was not mnm sure abt what I want n need beka

#Relationship
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