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Anger Management (5)
“Those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.”
Pr 11:13 NLT
If you’re serious about managing your anger, here are two things to keep in mind: (1) Don’t hang out your dirty laundry in public. Keep it in the laundry room. When you’re hurt and angry, spreading gossip about your offender comes naturally. Don’t do it. The Bible says, “A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.” Dirty laundry generally gets aired in two ways: (a) Embarrassment: You say things when you know others will hear them. (b) Subtlety: You make jokes about their appearance, their friends and family, their personal hang-ups and habits in order to belittle them. This results in embarrassment for the other person, widens the gap between you, and makes reconciliation virtually impossible. The Bible says, “Love covers all sins” (Pr 10:12 NKJV). (2) Don’t act in an un-Christlike way. For example, don’t say, “He brought it on himself, so let him get over it.” That may be true, but as a follower of Christ, don’t walk away and leave wounds to fester and become infected. “Forgive, even as Christ…has forgiven you” (See Eph 4:32). How did Christ forgive you? Was it after you’d acknowledged, confessed, repented, and earned grace? No. Paul says, “When we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son” (Ro 5:10 NKJV). Just as God took the initiative, you are called to extend grace to other people before they ask for forgiveness. And even if they choose to remain your enemy, you must forgive them anyhow. Only then will you have peace, your wounds will be healed, and you will be able to put it behind you.
Anger Management (3)
"Out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” Lk 6:45 NIV
What you store on your computer’s hard drive can be recalled by touching a key. Jesus said: “The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart…the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.” And when you download old resentments you grow bitter. When you’re angry, deal with it quickly. Don’t walk around on a “slow boil.” And don’t sit around hoping the other person will see the light and apologize to you. What if they never do? Jesus said, “If your brother sins against you, go to him and try to make things right” (See Mt 18:15). What do you value most—your point of view, or the relationship? When you “stuff” your anger and refuse to deal with the issue in a healthy way, you add another skeleton to your emotional closet. Imagine what that does to you. Doctors say resentment eats at your stomach lining, attacks your immune system, and predisposes you to heart problems, cancers, and other physical, social, and emotional disorders. And that’s not all! It preoccupies your mind, drains your energy, and cripples your creativity. It strains your fellowship with God, your family, and friends, as well as denying your offender an opportunity to clear their conscience and make things right with God and with you. Until you deal with the issue, you’ll drag it around like a ball and chain. Refuse to live that way! Ask God for the humility and courage to deal with the issue—today.
Anger Management (1)
Don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Eph 4:26 NLT
Here’s a Bible plan for growth that includes anger management: “Let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy. So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. And don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil…Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them…Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you” (vv. 23-32 NLT). God gave you every emotion you have, including anger. But He wants you to handle it the right way. Note the words “let us…tell the truth.” When you’re angry, instead of denying it, use it to bring about positive change. Saying, “I’ve been feeling angry because I value our relationship and I’d like to talk about it,” brings healing and solutions. Pretending you’re not angry when you are is basically dishonest. So is exaggeration. “You never listen to me…You always ignore my wishes…Nobody does anything around here except me.” Such generalizations are untrue and serve only to aggravate and polarize, guaranteeing the problem gets obscured and goes unsolved. God’s will is for you to control your anger rather than letting your anger control you.
Having the Courage to Stand Up for God
“Don’t worry about how or what you should speak. For you will be given what to say at that hour because you are not speaking, but the Spirit of your Father is speaking through you” (Matthew 10:19b-20 HCSB)
“Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent” (Acts 18:9b NIV).
As you search Scripture for God’s truth, it’s important to understand what the Bible says about three controversial issues. I mention these three because they are the ones you need the most courage to speak up about. Why? Because not only will many people disagree with you about these topics, they will also be very passionate in their argument.
It takes an uncommon courage to stand up against that kind of pressure.
There are a lot of parts of the Bible that people don’t have a problem with, like “You must help the poor.” Nobody disagrees with that. But there are three areas related to sanctity that some Christians avoid talking about. They are:
The sanctity of life: God has a purpose for every unborn child. God planned your life before you were born: “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed” (Psalm 139:16 NLT). We are to speak up for those who can’t speak for themselves — the unborn, the 70 million Americans who would be here if they hadn’t been aborted. If I claim to be a Christian, then I must believe that every life is sacred.
The sanctity of sex: Sex is only for marriage. Sex was God’s idea. It isn’t dirty or wrong; sex is holy. “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral” (Hebrews 13:4 NIV). God’s instructions never change: Premarital sex is unacceptable to God. Living together without being married is unacceptable to God. Adultery is unacceptable to God. Pornography and the objectification of women are unacceptable to God.
The sanctity of marriage: One man and one woman for life. That is God’s intended, original design. A lot of people ask, “Well, what about all the polygamy in the Bible?” The Bible doesn’t approve everything it reports the Bible. So why do we call it a “holy” Bible? Because it tells the truth, and it is very clear on the issue of marriage: “At the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh . . .’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Matthew 19:4-6 NIV).
There are many issues of life where people of goodwill can disagree. For example, there’s no economic recovery plan in the Bible, and Christians can disagree on that. But if you call yourself a disciple of Christ, you need to line yourself up with what God says about the sanctity of these three things. And you need to have the courage to stand up for them, even and especially when it’s not the popular or politically correct thing to do.
Focus On What Really Matters
“Life is not measured by how much you own.” Lk 12:15 NLT One day a man was talking to an angel. The angel said, “What can I do for you?” The man said, “Show me the Wall Street Journal one year from today. This way, I’ll know where to invest my money and become a multimillionaire.” So the angel snapped his fingers and out came a Wall Street Journal dated one year in the future. The man flipped the pages of the newspaper, studying the listings and observing which stocks would be high and which ones would be low. But in the midst of his joy, tears began to roll down his cheeks. Why? Because when he looked over the obituary column, there was his face. God is not opposed to you acquiring and achieving things in life. But He wants you to know that this life can only offer so much, and unless you live each day in the light of eternity, you’re going to waste your time on the wrong things. It’s okay to enjoy temporal things, as long as your main focus is on eternal things. Paul said: “My life is worth nothing to me unless I use it for finishing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus—the work of telling others the Good News about the wonderful grace of God” (Ac 20:24 NLT). In the UK if you live to be one hundred, you may receive a “Congratulations” card from Buckingham Palace, signed by the Queen of England herself. But it doesn’t compare to the “well done” you’ll receive from God for fulfilling the assignment He has given you here on earth.
Set Goals For Your Life
“Write the vision and make it plain.” Hab 2:2 NKJV Only when you’re clear about your personal goals, can you measure your personal growth. Here are eight proven principles that will help you to establish the right goals for your life: (1) Begin with prayer; otherwise the ladder you’re climbing may be leaning against the wrong wall. “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but…the Lord’s purpose… prevails” (Pr 19:21 NIV). (2) Think on paper. God told Habakkuk, “Write the vision and make it plain.” Writing your goals down gives them a sense of permanency, plus it energizes you. (3) Set deadlines. “The vision is yet for an appointed time” (Hab 2:3 NKJV). Without a definite beginning and ending, it’s easy to procrastinate and get nowhere. (4) List the steps you need to take. Then keep the list before you at all times; it will show you the path to follow. (5) Prioritize the steps in order of importance. What do you need to do first? What can you do later? An organized plan is always better than trying to carry stuff around in your head. (6) Take action—now. “Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity” (Eph 5:15-16 NIV). A mediocre plan that’s implemented always beats a brilliant plan that isn’t. (7) Do something each day to move you forward. For example, read systematically through the Bible in a year…call a specific number of clients every week…engage in physical activity every day. (8) Have goals you’re willing to devote your life to. The Psalmist said, “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Ps 90:12 NIV).
Get The Mix Right!
In order for cement to become concrete, it must be mixed with sand and water. If you don’t get the mix right, the cement will never become concrete. And just as your body needs good nutrition each day, your soul needs to be fed on God’s Word. But you can’t stop there. You must act on what you hear and read. Faith is acting like God is telling the truth! If you don’t act on God’s Word, it won’t do you any good. “The message they heard did not benefit them, because it was not mixed with faith (with the leaning of the entire personality on God in absolute trust and confidence in His power, wisdom, and goodness) by those who heard it.” To get the results God’s Word promises, note what you must “mix” in: “Confidence in his power, wisdom, and goodness.” Why do you go to church and sit down on a pew? Because you are confident that the pew will hold your weight. The reverse is also true. You may say you believe the pew can hold your weight, but if you never sit down on it, you’re not exercising faith—because you’re not acting on what you say you believe. What does it mean to “act” in faith? (1) To agree with God’s Word and refuse to say anything that contradicts it. (2) To wait patiently, allowing God to fulfill His Word in His own way and on His own schedule. “Faith is the substance of things hoped for” (Heb 11:1). Note the word “substance.” Your faith must be based on something substantial—and that “something” is the tried, proven, unfailing truth of God’s Word.
Shout It From The Housetops
“Let the redeemed of the Lord say so.” Ps 107:2 NKJV No matter how badly you have failed, God will give you another chance. After Jonah had disobeyed God, spent three days in the belly of a whale, and been regurgitated on the shore at Nineveh, the Bible says, “The word of the Lord came unto Jonah the second time” (Jnh 3:1). King David’s sins were front-page tabloid material. Yet God restored him, and he wrote: “He…brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay…set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps. He has put a new song in my mouth—praise to our God; many will see it and fear, and will trust in the Lord” (Ps 40:2-3 NKJV). When God restores you, it doesn’t matter who’s fighting against you. When He raises you up, no one can keep you down. If God has redeemed you—“say so.” Nobody else can tell your story. Nobody else knows what God has done for you. Nobody else knows how far you’ve come. Nobody else knows what you’ve been through. But you do—you know it was only by God’s grace that you survived. So don’t allow the Devil to steal your testimony. It may have taken you longer than everybody else, but God has given you the victory. The Devil would love to silence you. Why? Because when you tell people what God has done for you, someone else will be set free. The Bible says, “Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom He has redeemed from the hand of the enemy.” So the word for you today is: Shout it from the housetops!
How Change Happens (5)
“And he was limping because of his hip.” Ge 32:31 NIV The Bible says, “The sun rose above [Jacob] as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip.” That’s significant, because the thigh muscle is one of the most powerful muscles in the human body. In order to get Jacob’s attention, God touched him at a point of strength. Once we start thinking, “This is what I’m really good at; this is where I’m really strong,” God may have to touch that very thing to get our attention. Jacob’s limp served as a lifelong reminder that he was no longer to trust in his own power, but in the power of God. He was no longer to live in his own strength, but in God’s strength. And in so doing he became a much stronger person. Think about it: Every time Jacob got in a mess, his first response was to turn tail and run. Sound like a familiar pattern? Do you do that? So God finally said, “I know how to take care of that—I’ll put a limp in his walk!” And for the rest of his life Jacob would have to stand and face his problems head-on, not in his own strength but in God’s strength. How about you? What’s the one thing you’d most like to change about your life? Do you want God to help you? He will—in His own way. He will use the process of crisis, commitment, confession, and cooperation. And when God does the changing, it will be permanent. You won’t have to worry about willpower and sticking with it because you’ll be cooperating with God, relaxing, and trusting in Him alone.
How Change Happens (3)
“The man asked him, ‘What is your name?’ ‘Jacob,’ he answered.” Ge 32:27 NIV
Change happens through confession. When he identified himself as “Jacob,” which means “deceiver,” Jacob was acknowledging his character flaws. This is an important part of God’s process for changing us, because we never change until we honestly face and admit our faults, sins, weaknesses, and mistakes. We need to say, “Lord, I have a problem, I’m in a mess and I admit I made it.” Then God can go to work. Ever notice how easy it is to make excuses? We become experts at blaming others and saying things like, “It’s not my fault, you know. It’s the environment I was brought up in—my parents are to blame.” Or, “The situation I’m in at work is because of my boss.” Why do we act and talk this way? Because it’s hard to admit our personal faults and failings, and it can be scary to ask for help. Why do we need to confess our faults to God? To let Him know what’s going on? No: He already knows that! When we tell God we’ve sinned, it is no surprise to Him; He knew our problems all along. We confess to Him because He wants us to say, “You’re right, God; I have a problem. I’ve blown it.” It is humbling to admit our mistakes, but once we do, God gives us access to His power to help change us for the better. And at that point we start to become the person we’ve always wanted to be. The truth is: God loves you just the way you are—but He loves you too much to leave you that way.
How Change Happens (1)
“We are changed into his glorious image.” 2Co 3:18 NLT
Change happens through crisis. God changed Jacob’s name, which means “deceiver,” to Israel, which means “a prince with God.” And He did it through crisis. Realizing he had to go home and face the wrath of his brother Esau, whom he’d mistreated, Jacob became desperate. That night in his tent he wrestled with the angel of the Lord. And the change in his life didn’t come quickly or easily, because we’re told he wrestled until daybreak. But suddenly it dawned on Jacob that he was wrestling with God, and it was a fight he couldn’t win. Likewise, God will let you wrestle with an issue you can’t resolve, to get your attention. He’ll bring you to the place where you must concede, “I can’t handle this situation. It’s too big for me. I need God!” If that’s where you are today, you’re on the cusp of a breakthrough. If you’re asking God to make you comfortable in the mess you’re in, forget it—it’s not going to happen. “As an eagle stirs up its nest…so the Lord alone led him” (Dt 32:11-12 NKJV). A mother eagle will upend her nest and push her children off a cliff to teach them how to fly. Can you imagine what they’re thinking? “It’s my mother doing this to me!” And God will do the same to you. He’ll allow a crisis in order to get your attention. He knows you won’t change until your fear of change is surpassed by the pain you’re experiencing. Bottom line: “The Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.”
God Is Your Unfailing Source
“The brook dried up.” 1Ki 17:7 NIV
The Psalmist wrote, “Joyful are those…whose hope is in the Lord their God” (Ps 146:5 NLT). One author writes: “Sometimes when there’s not enough money to make ends meet, people tell us to budget and we chuckle. We look at the situation and say, ‘No way.’ That’s the time to trust God. Your possibilities aren’t limited by past or present circumstances. If there’s not enough to pay legitimate expenses, do your best and then let go. Trust God to supply your need, then look beyond your wallet. Look to your source. Claim a divine, unlimited supply. Do your part. Strive for financial responsibility in thought and action. Ask for wisdom, and listen to God’s leadings. Then let go of your fears and your need to control. We all know money is a necessary part of living—and so does God.” F. B. Meyer said: “The education of our faith is incomplete till we learn that God’s providence works through loss…There’s a ministry to us through the failure and fading of things. The dwindling brook where Elijah sat is a picture of our lives! ‘Some time later the brook dried up’ (1Ki 17:7 NIV) is the history of our yesterdays and the prophecy of our tomorrows. We must learn the difference between trusting in the gift and trusting in the giver. The gift may last for a season, but the giver is eternal. If the Lord had led Elijah directly to the widow at Zarephath, he’d have missed something that helped make him a better man—living by faith. Whenever our earthly resources dry up, it’s so we may learn that our hope and health are in God.”
Today Share Your Faith With Someone
“A woman of Samaria came to draw water.” Jn 4:7 NKJV
One day Jesus met a woman who’d come to draw water from a well. After five failed marriages, her trust in men was zero—and her self-esteem was minus zero! But after her encounter with Christ, she left the well radically changed. When it comes to sharing our faith, we learn three important lessons from her story: (1) Jesus sees the best in everybody. “The Pharisees…complained, saying, ‘This Man receives sinners’” (Lk 15:2 NKJV). And when it came to the woman at the well, they were right. She’d been through five divorces and was the talk of the town because she was living with another man. Yet she was the first person to whom Jesus introduced Himself as the Messiah. Why didn’t He do that when He called His disciples? Or performed His first miracle? Or interviewed Nicodemus? Because Jesus doesn’t measure you by your past or your pedigree—but by your potential. (2) Jesus changes you, then He uses you to change others. This woman was the first person to share the gospel in Samaria, and “many…Samaritans…believed in Him because of the word of the woman” (Jn 4:39 NKJV). Out of your brokenness, God can use you to make others whole. (3) Jesus doesn’t need you to explain Him, just to introduce Him. He speaks for Himself. The Bible says: “Many more believed because of His own word…They said to the woman, ‘Now we believe, not because of what you said, for we ourselves have heard Him and we know that this is indeed the Christ’” (vv. 41-42 NKJV). Today share your faith with someone.
The Truth About Marriage (3)
“The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” Lk 6:38 NLT The truth about the container: When the offering plate was passed in church, a lady didn’t put anything in. When she complained all the way home about how poor the service was, her little boy said, “Mom, that proves if you don’t put anything in, you won’t get anything out.” Marriage is like an empty container—you get out what you put in. This truth frees you to make your relationship rich and rewarding by becoming a giver rather than a taker. Some people think the container comes filled with romance, sexual fulfillment, and being served in the style to which they’ve become accustomed. They think they can take whatever they want from a never-ending supply—instant, low maintenance, satisfaction guaranteed! Then one day they dip in and come up empty. Shocked, disappointed, angry, despairing, and hopeless, they conclude that their partner failed, fooled, or forsook them. Why else would the container be empty? Then they go looking for a new container. The truth is, it’s your responsibility to make enough deposits every day to guarantee sufficient withdrawals for a rich relationship. Jesus said, “The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” Ask yourself what you’d like to have in the container, and how much. Then deposit enough to generate that amount. J. Allan Petersen said: “There’s no love in marriage; love is in people, and people put it into marriage. There’s no romance in marriage; people have to infuse it into their marriages. A couple must form the habit of giving, loving, serving, praising—keeping the box full.”
The Truth About Marriage (1)
“You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Jn 8:32 NLT The idea of “the perfect marriage” misleads and disillusions us, preparing us to walk away when fantasy clashes with reality. And it always does! Only when you accept the truth about frail, faltering, frustrating people—and you yourself are one—can you find lasting happiness in marriage. So for the next few days let’s look at some of the most common misconceptions about marriage. The love bug: We think if we’re in the right place, at the right time, with the right person, love will “bite” us and we’ll embark on a lifetime of bliss. The trouble is, when we are worn out from taking care of kids, jobs, and mortgages, the love bug flies off. In the daily grind of dishes, diapers, and drudgery, something has to give. So romance vacates center stage and reality takes over. And because we confuse romance with true love, we mistakenly think love has moved out and we need to follow it. The truth is, love doesn’t die because romance bows to reality. If two people who fall in love are willing to stand together in love through the challenges of life, romance can blossom again stronger and more resilient than ever. Romance may bring us together, but unselfish love keeps us together. The Bible says: “Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have…Isn’t always ‘me first,’ doesn’t fly off the handle, doesn’t keep score of the sins of others…always looks for the best, never looks back, but keeps going to the end” (1Co 13:4-7 TM).
Anger Management (4)
Don’t use…abusive language.” Eph 4:29 NLT
The Bible says: “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live” (vv. 29-30 NLT). Notice, when you lash out in anger you not only hurt the other person, you grieve the Holy Spirit. Have you considered that? As followers of Christ we’re called to try to understand what the other person needs. That means not bringing up previously confessed offenses, dragging in other people, or using wisecracks about someone’s weight, color, IQ, or physical, mental, and emotional limitations. Don’t bring up things that cloud the issue and keep you from finding a solution. And don’t raise the decibel level in order to intimidate or manipulate. God made you with a capacity for anger because when handled right it can be the fuel needed to bring positive change and the medicine that heals. So: (1) Seek a solution, not a “victory.” Name-calling and “diagnosing” others just makes things worse. Your focus shouldn’t be on what they did, but what you can do together to resolve it. (2) Acknowledge your flaws and ask for forgiveness. Admitting your imperfections makes it easier for the other person to admit theirs. (3) For every difficulty you address, give a sincere compliment. Instead of criticizing, try saying, “I’m sure this wasn’t easy for you to hear. Thanks for listening to me so graciously.” Being solution-focused instead of blame-focused gives people something to live up to, not down to.
Anger Management (2)
My inmost being will rejoice when your lips speak right things.” Pr 23:16 NKJV
When it comes to practicing anger management, here are two important Bible principles: (1) Don’t blame people and things. Blaming is a way of evading responsibility while pointing your finger elsewhere. “If only you’d arrive on time, I wouldn’t have to nag you,” or “If you’d quit nagging me, maybe I’d start being on time.” Words like that don’t help, they just antagonize the other person, perpetuate your anger, and fail to get the results you want. (2) Don’t use words as weapons or a form of control. Instead keep your emotions in check and express them in a healthy way. Remember, your goal is to solve the problem and strengthen the relationship, not leave wounds that fester. Is this easy to do? No—that’s why you need God’s help. The Bible says that your words can crush the other person’s spirit (See Pr 18:14), break their heart (See Pr 15:4), and destroy the relationship (See Pr 18:21). Solomon said that angry words “go down into a man’s inmost parts” (Pr 26:22 NIV). What you say can live in the memory of another person their whole life—all the way to the grave. Is that what you want? Surely not! On the other hand, anger properly managed never needs to be regretted or repented of. Learn to discern the difference between the anger you feel and the words you speak. Anger can reveal what needs to be changed in the relationship. So ask God to show you what needs changing—first in yourself, then in the other person.
Born Again!
Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.
John 3:3
Born again. Do you know what Jesus had in mind when He said those two words to Nicodemus? He was talking covenant talk. He was telling Nicodemus what it meant to have a covenant with God.
Let me paint the picture I believe was in Jesus’ mind. Imagine a baby, a little baby born of an unwed mother. No one knows who its daddy is and no one wants to know. He is a child no one wants. He doesn’t belong to anyone.
Now, picture the best kind of family you can think of. A family that loves God. The man has a good job. They’re blessed financially. They’re givers and lovers of people, and they fall in love with this baby. Before long, they adopt it.
What’s happened? That baby was reborn. He got a new set of parents. Through adoption, he has now become an heir. Why? Not because of anything the baby has done. Those parents didn’t say, “I want you to look at that baby. I’m so impressed with all that that child has done for us. He has certainly earned our love and respect.”
No, it’s a baby. It couldn’t have done anything to earn its new life. This man and this woman agreed together out of the love in their hearts and bestowed grace on that child. Now he has access to everything they have. When they offer him a bottle, he doesn’t knock the bottle away and say, “I’m so humble and undeserving. Just give me water.”
Of course not. That baby acts like part of the family—and not just part of the family but the best part of the family. Because in Jesus’ day a covenant or adopted child had the same birthright as the firstborn son.
That’s what Jesus was talking about when He said, “You must be born again.” He was talking about grace. He was talking about a new relationship of favor. A new family. A new authority. A new power.
If you feel unworthy to receive the rich blessings God has for you today, think about that. Meditate on it, so instead of worrying about and struggling with the needs in your life, you can just walk boldly into the throne room of your Father and receive help to get those needs met.
Discover what it really means to be a blood-bought child of Almighty God with a big brother like Jesus. Discover what it means to be born again!
We Know God’s Truth Through Careful Consideration
“Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established” (Proverbs 4:26 HCSB).
When you tell God, “I want the truth more than anything else,” he will reveal his truth to you in a variety of ways, such as through creation or your conscience and also through careful consideration.
In other words, truth is knowable. You can test it. You can experiment with it. You can prove it.
If I want to go to San Francisco and I follow a map that takes me to San Francisco, and the next week I follow the same map to San Francisco again, eventually I figure out that the map is true.
The same is true of the Bible: If you follow its map again and again, you’ll find it to be true. It always takes you where it says it’s going to take you. You may not always like where it takes you, but it always takes you where it says it’s going to take you.
Often people say, “Why won’t God just write it in the sky?” Why would God do that? He gave you a brain. But most people never slow down long enough for such careful consideration. Most people just drift through life.
The Bible tells us, “Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established” (Proverbs 4:26 HCSB).
Spend some time in careful consideration and thoughtful observation, and ask yourself: “Am I on a true path?”
You Belong To God
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you…You are Mine.” Isa 43:1 NKJV When God redeems you, He owns you. And what He owns, He protects! This is illustrated in the story of Belshazzar. The Bible says: “King Belshazzar held a great feast for his one thousand nobles…heady with the wine, [he] ordered that the gold and silver chalices his father Nebuchadnezzar had stolen from God’s Temple of Jerusalem be brought in so that he and his nobles, his wives and concubines, could drink from them” (Da 5:1-2 TM). Now, if they’d just abused some worthless old cup it might not have mattered, but God valued these sacred vessels too much to let them be mishandled. So out of the invisible sleeve of the night, the finger of God wrote the fate of Belshazzar on his palace walls. “That same night…Belshazzar was murdered…Darius the Mede succeeded him” (vv. 30-31 TM). As a redeemed child of God, here’s an unchanging principle you can stand on: “He permitted no man to do them wrong…saying, ‘Do not touch My anointed ones’” (1Ch 16:21-22 NKJV). You may have to fight on foreign soil, work at home in a difficult situation, or endure hardship for your faith. But you can be sure of one thing—God has too much invested in you to let you be destroyed. And any time Satan tries, God will interrupt his party and say, “This vessel is off limits—it took Me too long to teach this woman to pray…I’ve invested too many years training this man how to overcome…They’ve endured too much for My name’s sake for Me to let you harm them. Take your hands off them; they’re Mine!”
Write It Down—Then Tear It Up!
“Forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead.” Php 3:13 NKJV There will always be people who speak ill of you. “She’ll never amount to anything… His parents were nothing, his grandparents were nothing, and he’s going to be nothing too!” The question is: Who are you going to believe, God or your critics? According to Scripture: “Anyone…in Christ…is a new creation; old things have passed away…all things have become new” (2Co 5:17 NKJV). God says that by His grace you’re going to prove your critics wrong, so stop listening to their negative predictions. Stop believing the family members, schoolteachers, employers, and so-called “friends” who try to put you down. Turn a deaf ear to racism and sexism. Jesus said, “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (Jn 8:32 NIV). Renew your mind daily with the truth of God’s Word (See Ro 12:1-2). You may have been abused, misused, rejected, and neglected, but it’s time to forget those things that are behind and start reaching forward. When God speaks a word over your life, as far as He’s concerned it has already been accomplished; it’s “a done deal!” Now it’s your job to believe it, speak it, and walk in the reality of it each day. When someone says something that leaves a scar on your heart and mind, do this: (1) Write it down on a piece of paper. (2) Ask God to help you forgive them and to erase the scar. (3) Tear up the paper, toss it into the garbage, and “press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Php 3:14 NKJV).
Don’t Give Place To Envy
“Lord…you guard all that is mine.” Ps 16:5 NLT Have you allowed envy to form a “stronghold” in your life? Do you find yourself avoiding or feeling resentful of certain people because of their success? The Bible says, “Envy rots the bones” (Pr 14:30 NIV) and the New Living Translation paraphrases it this way: “Jealousy is like cancer in the bones.” If you find yourself constantly criticizing someone and craving what they have, read these words and think about them carefully and prayerfully: “I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen” (Jer 29:11-12 TLB). In essence, envy says to God, “You made a mistake when you made me like I am. I want to be like that other person, and have what they have!” No, God has a unique calling and destiny for you. So instead of giving place to envy, let it motivate you to become the best possible “you”—the person God intended you to be. If you’re fighting a losing battle with envy, here’s a prescription from God’s Word you need to take every day: “Lord, you alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing. You guard all that is mine. The land you have given me is a pleasant land. What a wonderful inheritance! I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice” (Ps 16:5-9 NLT).
Spend Time Alone With God
“Be still, and know that I am God!” Ps 46:10 NLT God can speak to you anytime, anywhere, through anybody, by dropping a thought into your mind (See 1Co 2:16). But because that thought can be crowded out by busyness, He says, “Be still, and know that I am God.” In stillness you can hear God more clearly. “Jesus used many…illustrations to teach the people as much as they could understand…but afterward, when he was alone with his disciples, he explained everything to them” (Mk 4:33-34 NLT). In High Call, High Privilege, Gail MacDonald writes: “The ancient desert fathers used to commit themselves to a disciplinary creed: silence, solitude, and inner peace. Only after adequate amounts of time listening, did they consider themselves ready to speak…Today there’s a strange logic that spiritual resource and renewal are found in constantly seeking new voices, attending more meetings…to exchange half-thought-out opinions…We fall into the trap of believing God is most pleased when we’ve maximized our information, our schedules, and our relationships. Disengagement means silence before God…a time of heavenly discussion during which we listen more than we speak. And silence demands solitude.” In waiting quietly before God, your spiritual ear is trained to know His voice. Sylvia Gunter writes: “I understand why David had to command his soul to be still…Being quiet is difficult…almost impossible for some of us. But I’ve discovered that my soul and spirit have been starving for stillness for a long time, and now that I’ve given my soul a taste of stillness again it will not be satisfied unless it’s a regular part of my day.”
How Change Happens (4)
“Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, ‘It is because I saw God face to face.’”
Ge 32:30 NIV
Change happens through cooperation. God started changing Jacob the moment he admitted who he was and began to cooperate with His plan. Jacob named the place where he wrestled with the angel “Peniel,” meaning “the face of God.” Each of us must eventually come face to face with God, and when we do He can change us. In essence God told Jacob, “Now we can get down to business. Cooperate, and trust Me. I’ll make the changes you want, and I’ll bless you.” Notice: God didn’t say, “Try hard and use your willpower to become perfect.” That doesn’t work, and God knows it. Willpower alone doesn’t bring lasting change in our lives. It just deals with the outward circumstances. Internal motivation brings about lasting change, and that’s what God works on. He told Jacob, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel” (v. 28 NIV). Jacob would never be the same. Once you have a personal encounter with the living God, He changes you. He changed Jacob from a “cheater” to a “prince.” God saw his potential. He looked beyond the tough exterior of a guy who portrayed himself as hardened and worldly-wise. God saw all Jacob’s weaknesses, but He also saw beneath the surface: “That’s not the real you, Jacob, you’re actually an Israel—a prince.” And the same goes for each of us: “We are…heirs…and joint heirs with Christ…that we may…be glorified together” (Ro 8:16-17 NKJV). In the words of Paul: “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ” (Php 1:6 NIV).
Change happens through cooperation. God started changing Jacob the moment he admitted who he was and began to cooperate with His plan. Jacob named the place where he wrestled with the angel “Peniel,” meaning “the face of God.” Each of us must eventually come face to face with God, and when we do He can change us. In essence God told Jacob, “Now we can get down to business. Cooperate, and trust Me. I’ll make the changes you want, and I’ll bless you.” Notice: God didn’t say, “Try hard and use your willpower to become perfect.” That doesn’t work, and God knows it. Willpower alone doesn’t bring lasting change in our lives. It just deals with the outward circumstances. Internal motivation brings about lasting change, and that’s what God works on. He told Jacob, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel” (v. 28 NIV). Jacob would never be the same. Once you have a personal encounter with the living God, He changes you. He changed Jacob from a “cheater” to a “prince.” God saw his potential. He looked beyond the tough exterior of a guy who portrayed himself as hardened and worldly-wise. God saw all Jacob’s weaknesses, but He also saw beneath the surface: “That’s not the real you, Jacob, you’re actually an Israel—a prince.” And the same goes for each of us: “We are…heirs…and joint heirs with Christ…that we may…be glorified together” (Ro 8:16-17 NKJV). In the words of Paul: “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ” (Php 1:6 NIV).
How Change Happens (2)
“I will not let you go unless you bless me.” Ge 32:26 NIV
Change happens through commitment. When Jacob realized he was wrestling with the angel of the Lord, he said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” That’s what it takes—commitment. Jacob was committed and persistent; he stuck with it until he worked his way through it. He didn’t like where he was any more than you do. It was frustrating and it was getting him down. But he was totally committed to sticking with it until God turned it around for his good. When God gets our attention through a crisis, He doesn’t always solve it immediately; sometimes He waits to see whether we really mean business. We’re so conditioned to instant everything—instant food, instant Internet access, instant success—that when we don’t get an immediate answer to our prayer or an instant turnaround we say, “Forget it, God.” The fact is you didn’t get into this mess overnight, and you won’t get out of it overnight. Sometimes God has to remove our weaknesses layer by layer. Experts tell us it takes six weeks of doing the same thing every day before it becomes a habit. Think of that in terms of developing the habit of praying and reading your Bible each day, or relearning to love your spouse. That’s six weeks…forty-two days…over a thousand hours…and Satan will fight you at every turn. So what should you do? Spend time with God. “They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint” (Isa 40:31).
The Qualities Of A Spiritual Leader
“Let the elders who rule well be counted worthy of double honor.” 1Ti 5:17 NKJV
To be a spiritual leader worth following: (1) You must be accountable to someone. Someone who knows you well enough to pray with you, strengthen you in your vulnerable areas, and counsel you on important decisions. Authority without accountability inevitably leads to disaster. (2) Your personal priorities must be in order. Priorities have a way of slipping. Too many of us become successful at the cost of a broken home and failing health. Why? Because we allowed our priorities to slip. (3) Your walk with God must be consistent. David said, “Your word I have treasured in my heart, that I may not sin against You” (Ps 119:11 NAS). A disciplined daily walk with God is your best protection against sin. If instead of spending time with God you’re spending it on things that have become more important, it should alarm you. Pay particular attention to the word “treasured.” It means to value and protect something, and let nothing threaten it. Take time to pray and read your Bible every day—and guard that time with your life. Give God your mind every morning when it’s fresh. And if you’re a pastor, your first calling isn’t the building project, the board, or the budget, it’s “feed my sheep” (Jn 21:16). If Saturday finds you searching for a sermon outline on the Internet, make some changes. Delegate secondary things and get back to putting first things first. “Seek out from among you…men…whom we may appoint over this business; but we will give ourselves continually to prayer and…ministry of the word” (Ac 6:3-4 NKJV).
How To Maintain Your Peace
“Search for peace, and work to maintain it.” Ps 34:14 NLT
You can maintain a peaceful state of mind wherever you go and whatever you do. “How is that possible?” you ask. The Bible says, “Search for peace, and work to maintain it.” To enjoy a life of peace, you must first recognize what’s stealing your peace. Satan uses the same tactics on everyone, but we each have particular issues. For example, one person may be disturbed by having to do two or three things at the same time, while another may be energized by fielding several projects at once. We’re all different, and we must learn to know ourselves. Satan studies you carefully and knows which buttons to push. One Bible teacher writes: “I can endure things better when I’m not tired…so [Satan] waits to attack until I am worn out. I learned by pursuing peace, what Satan already knew about me; now I try not to get overly tired because I know I’m opening a door for him when I do. It will be virtually impossible to enjoy a life of peace if you don’t study yourself, and know what your ‘peace stealers’ are. Keep a list of each time you get upset. Ask yourself what caused the problem, and write it down. Be honest with yourself or you’ll never break free.” In the middle of life’s storms you can be anchored by God’s peace. But He won’t just drop it into your lap; you have a part to play. You must “seek, inquire for… crave peace and pursue (go after) it!” (AMP). So if you’ve lost your peace today—go after it and get it back.
The truth about marriage (3)
“The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” Lk 6:38 NLT The truth about the container: When the offering plate was passed in church, a lady didn’t put anything in. When she complained all the way home about how poor the service was, her little boy said, “Mom, that proves if you don’t put anything in, you won’t get anything out.” Marriage is like an empty container—you get out what you put in. This truth frees you to make your relationship rich and rewarding by becoming a giver rather than a taker. Some people think the container comes filled with romance, sexual fulfillment, and being served in the style to which they’ve become accustomed. They think they can take whatever they want from a never-ending supply—instant, low maintenance, satisfaction guaranteed! Then one day they dip in and come up empty. Shocked, disappointed, angry, despairing, and hopeless, they conclude that their partner failed, fooled, or forsook them. Why else would the container be empty? Then they go looking for a new container. The truth is, it’s your responsibility to make enough deposits every day to guarantee sufficient withdrawals for a rich relationship. Jesus said, “The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” Ask yourself what you’d like to have in the container, and how much. Then deposit enough to generate that amount. J. Allan Petersen said: “There’s no love in marriage; love is in people, and people put it into marriage. There’s no romance in marriage; people have to infuse it into their marriages. A couple must form the habit of giving, loving, serving, praising—keeping the box full.”
The Truth About Marriage (2)
“Love can’t be bought, love can’t be sold—it’s not to be found in the marketplace.” SS 8:7 TM The truth about Mr. and Mrs. Right: Many who excel in their careers struggle when it comes to meeting people in a social setting. This has given rise to the twenty-first century phenomenon of finding a mate through the Internet. Today, in the western world, two out of five marriages begin that way. Generally speaking, dating services profile people based on their age, looks, values, tastes, ambitions, and preferences, and help them get together for a date. Well, guess what? The divorce rate is just as high among couples who met via the Internet as those who did it the old-fashioned way. How come? Because “love can’t be bought, love can’t be sold—it’s not to be found in the marketplace.” And when the bubble bursts, three things happen: (1) We cry, manipulate, or pressure our mate. And when that doesn’t work we blame them for changing and making us miserable. “He’s not the man I thought he was.” Maybe not, but he’s the one you married—and, with some exceptions, the problem isn’t all his. (2) We conclude that Mr. and Mrs. Right are Mr. and Mrs. Wrong. So we start searching for the right one, or give up on the opposite sex as being false, faithless, and fickle. (3) We realize that lasting happiness can only be found in one Person—God. So instead of trying to find the right person, we decide to become the right person; the one God created us to be…giving generously, allowing others to be real, limited, changeable human beings, and looking to God for our joy.
Put Away The Measuring Stick!
“If you…Lord, kept a record of sins…who could stand?” Ps 130:3 NIV We live in a results-oriented society where we’re rewarded for our performance in school, in sports, and on the job. But God doesn’t think like that. His thoughts and ways are far above ours (See Isa 55:8-9). He’s not impressed by “empty rituals…He wants you to listen to him!” (1Sa 15:22 TM). Feelings and emotions are powerful, but they’re seldom objective. And when you base your worth as a Christian on your performance as a flawed human being, the Enemy has a field day. Satan is called “the accuser of our brethren” (Rev 12:10); he wants you to run a check-list of your failures and mistakes. That way he can torment you by reminding you of all the times you lose your temper, criticize, fail to speak up for what’s right, or let a misconception go unchecked to make yourself look better. David said if the “Lord, kept a record of sin…who could stand?” Even the most disciplined believer has areas where he or she struggles and fails. It’s why we need God’s grace and forgiveness 24/7. “He knows how weak we are” (Ps 103:14 NLT), and He’s never surprised when despite our best intentions, we fall short. Reimar Schultze says: “God doesn’t measure us by our performance, but by our love for Jesus. Indeed, in the Kingdom of God our love for Jesus is our performance. Everything else is secondary. [Our] desire to be with Him, to abide in Him, to keep in fellowship with Him, to please Him, is what our Master longs for.” So put away your measuring stick and be glad God’s not grading you based on your performance, but on Christ’s performance.