What day is Valentine's Day this year?
St. Valentine's Day, happens this Tuesday on February 14. It's a day where people show their love and affection for another person - usually in the form of cards, flowers, gifts and messages, and yes it is only for lovers.
Who was St. Valentine?
The details are sketchy. Some say St Valentine was a priest from Rome who lived in the third century AD.
Emperor Claudius II had banned marriages, believing married men made bad soldiers and St Valentine is thought to have arranged marriages in secret.
He was imprisoned and sentenced to death for his crimes. There, St Valentine apparently fell in love with the jailer’s daughter and sent her a love letter signed ‘from your Valentine’ on February 14th, the day of his execution, as a goodbye.
The name 'Valentinus' is found in the Martyrologium Hieronymianum, a book which was compiled between 460 and 544.
What's Cupid got to do with it all?
Cupid is the god of desire, erotic love, attraction and affection. He is often portrayed as the son of the love goddess Venus and the war god Mars.
Cupid is also known in Latin also as Amor ("Love"). His Greek counterpart is Eros and he is just one of the ancient symbols associated with St Valentine’s Day, along with the shape of a heart, doves, and the colours red and pink.
People who fall in love are said to be ‘struck by Cupid’s arrow’.
It was during the middle of the 18th century that Valentine's started to take off in England, with lovers sending sweets and cards adorned with flowers, ribbons and images of cupids and birds.
Eventually huge numbers of printed cards replaced hand-written ones. In 1913, Hallmark Cards of Kansas City began mass producing Valentine's cards.
Now about a billion Valentine's Day cards are exchanged every year and it's the second largest seasonal card sending time of the year.
What to write in a Valentine's card
What message will you be writing to your loved one this Valentine's Day?
If you're thinking of just putting "Happy Valentine's Day" and leaving it there - well, that's fine. Not all of us can be poets. But if you wanted to go for something a bit more elaborate, why not take inspiration from some of the greatest love letters ever written?
But why do some people leave anonymous cards?
This trend was started by the Victorians, who thought it was bad luck to sign Valentine's cards with their names.
The Victorians also started the rose-giving trend. They were the favourite flower of Venus, the Roman goddess of love, and have come to indicate passion and romance.
Nowadays, more than 50 million roses are given for Valentine's Day every year.
Every year, there will of course be some people who do not receive any cards, flowers or gifts on Valentine's Day.
One teenager solved that problem by buying 900 carnations and giving them to out to all the girls at his school.
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St. Valentine during his performing one of the secret marriages of his time.
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Man's Best Friend
Short and bald, with a paunch and thick-rimmed glasses, Bill was a quiet man who welcomed solitude and enjoyed the company of books. Social activities that most people found exciting, he considered tedious. The only girlfriend Bill had ever had, accused him of fearing intimacy in his quest for solitude, and warned that if he continued behaving that way, he would die "a lonely old man." In self-defense, Bill insisted that even with one million people surrounding his deathbed, the event of dying would nonetheless remain incomprehensibly lonely, but even that argument did not prevent the girlfriend from ending their romance.
After celebrating his fifty-ninth birthday, and after considerable thought and nail-biting, Bill decided to acquire a dog. Altruistic in intent, he opted to visit the animal shelter and save a dog from euthanasia, rather than buy one from a pet store.
Bill walked slowly down the shelter's corridor and passed sixteen cages with dogs. Musty scents of urine and sweaty fur tingled his nostrils. Loud barks echoed loudly off the walls.
At first Bill plugged his nose, but then resigned to the smell for the sake of covering his ears. Desperation lurked in the dogs' eyes and impending fate. Bill wished he could adopt all of them.
A puppy with light-brown fur, a wrinkly forehead, and a curly tail, caught his eye and helped push aside sad thoughts. The puppy's innocent dark eyes convinced Bill that he had found his match. He mused that an older dog, even if loving and friendly, would inevitably carry attachments to its former owner, and thus limit the new relationship from evolving into the unconditional love he yearned for.
"I'll take him," Bill told the caretaker.
The tall, mild-mannered caretaker handed over the puppy, which began licking Bill's face. Moved by the wet affection, and feeling guilty he hadn't adopted all the dogs, Bill donated $200 to the animal foundation.
The grateful caretaker shook his hand and asked, "What will you name him?"
Bill shrugged. "I don't know."
"How about Kingston?" the caretaker said.
"Of course," Bill said, no doubt in his mind that Kingston was the perfect name for the puppy.
In the coming three months, Bill cared for Kingston, talked to him, even taught him to fetch a ball, shake paws and roll over. They took walks to a nearby park, and even went on a few hikes with a group of dog owners' social club of sorts. Kingston was playful with fellow canines, and Bill enjoyed watching his pet achieve an enlightened dog-self.
Bill befriended a dog owner named Joan - a sixty-year-old woman with frizzy gray hair and gentle blue eyes, whose dog, Millie, a Collie, was greatly fond of Kingston.
Bill grew fond of Joan, but, concerned he might be imposing, lacked the courage to encourage companionship other than with the dogs.
One day Joan suggested they explore a new trail - a three-mile hike through a nature reserve, where the dogs could wander without a leash. The trail ended by a pond, where they retired to a bench, and snacked on tuna sandwiches and a fruit salad that Joan brought in a picnic basket.
They were taking pleasure in watching children feed the ducks, when a blonde girl with pigtails came running across the grass. "Buddy, Buddy!"
Kingston's ears perked up. He raced toward the girl and jumped on her with great joy.
Bill watched with delight, for Kingston behaved well with youngsters, when it dawned on him that his dog had responded to the name, Buddy.
Could it be Kingston carried memories of a former master? Bill wrung his hands with concern and was about to call on his pet, when a man with wavy blonde hair walked up to them and asked, "Excuse me, but where did you get this dog?"
Continued...
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Kane, A Lesson In Love
Long ago I learned a profound lesson about love. That lesson was powerful and it has stayed with me. The experience that held the message didn’t appear to be all that special – at least I didn’t think it was until much later, when I realized that it helped to shape who I’d become. The lesson came from a jumble of human emotions that included joy and remorse and tragedy and loyalty and sorrow and honor and duty and many other qualities good people have come to be known for.
I was in the Navy in 2000. After a couple of years as a Navy corpsman I had the opportunity to take the exam advance to the next rank. The only problem was, they were giving the exam at a time when I would be home on leave and unable to take it.
But I managed to get scheduled to take the test at Brunswick Naval Air Station in Brunswick, Maine, about 130 miles from where I planned on spending my time off in Massachusetts. What made this such an adventuresome proposition was that my mother was born and raised in Brunswick and her entire family lived there.
So on the day of the exam mom and I drove to her brother’s house in Brunswick. She was to spend the day there while I took my test only a few miles away. We arrived in Brunswick in the morning, several hours before my exam. I spent the free time visiting with my relatives.
Joline’s Son
It was during this short time that I came in contact with the personification of love. That would have been my second cousin, Kane. Kane was the two-year old son of Joline, my first cousin. I hadn’t seen much of Joline other than the times my family would drive to Maine in the 1990s for summer vacations.
But Joline had always lived vividly in my memories as the kid who, on a sunny day while visiting Harpswell beach in June of 1990, told me in earnest that if a sand crab were to latch onto my toe, I’d have to live with the critter forever because crabs were impossible to remove from your toes once they’d latched on. Jolene was a radiant kid who was full of life.
Kane
At a glance Kane was a sight. He’d been born with useless craggy sticks for legs and a heart that wasn’t up to the task of taking him through life. And on that morning in the spring of 1990, I witnessed firsthand the profound effect that Kane’s physical shortcomings had on his mother. But I also witnessed so much more than that.
I saw an extended family that embraced this special child. A family that wouldn’t allow Kane to know he was different. My uncle Ray, Joline’s father, had constructed a small padded cart just a few inches off the floor for his grandson to get around. Using his hands to move about, the cart allowed Kane to scoot from place to place, room to room just as everyone else was able to do.
And Kane worked that little cart like a master, stopping and turning on a dime. But that wasn’t even close to all of it. Kane was a vital component of the dynamics of the entire family. He was more than just a member of the family, he was the centerpiece.
This child was the driver, the motivator, and the initiator of much of the interaction. The world revolved around him, and rightly so. With an eternal grin, an infectious laugh and the joy of the angels in heaven, it was easy to see that even at the tender age of two, Kane was very much a people-person, and a natural at it.
With wisdom of an individual far beyond his short time with us, it was clear to me that this boy intuitively understood even the most complex of human motivation and emotions. And much later in my life, after recalling my visit many, many times, I came to realize that God had sent this child to help some of us who just weren’t getting what love was all about.
Continued...
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Life is a ...
Continued...
At age 12, I had a severe allergic reaction to the Hepatitis B vaccine all students are required to have before they enter the 7th grade. It was the most life-changing moment I have (to this day) ever experienced. I would visit Dr. Chou every week with another strange problem, but even the best doctor in Southern Cali had no idea what was wrong with me. How would you like to feel that?
It was two weeks after my last visit with Dr. Chou when I noticed the bumps. They were hard like rocks, and seemed to be growing on the inside of both wrists. I cannot forget about the constant pain in not one, not two, but all of my joints. And, to top it off, I had this ugly white mark forming on my face and neck. Here we go again; another trip to the doctor and another 10 vials of blood. It was bad enough I had to quit golf. It was bad enough that fellow students called me names like granny hands, and duck because I waddled in pain from class to class.
My doctor diagnosed me first with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis and then changed it to Lupus. Now the strange thing is that lupus is hereditary, and absolutely no one in our family had ever had it. My mother and I went from doctor to doctor trying to see if anyone had answers but we always came up short. Eventually, it was my mom that started putting everything together. All of my problems started happening after my hepatitis b shots. Every child had to receive them to enter the seventh grade. After the first set of shots I got hives, which is a huge reaction. Why didn’t the doctors tell us? I got hives twice and shingles after the third shots. Everything matches up with my conditions and the shots. Yeast is a huge part of the vaccine and I soon became allergic to it. Mercury is also a huge part of the vaccine and if you have an allergic reaction to that you can have extreme muscle inflammation. It all started making sense.
To this day, my body is in pain, but my spirit is higher than it has ever been.
I don’t want to bore you with any more negative stories so here is the point to my crazy journey of life. Who am I? I’m not sure. Who could I have been without those shots? I don’t know. But when I think about what I have been through, and what I have overcome, I know I was meant to be here. I know I was meant to share my story, and speak to those who have the same questions. Life is a journey. One that God set for you before you were even born. Live that journey to the best of your ability, keep your head held high, and share the love God instilled with everyone that crosses your path.
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Sense Of Time: Two Minutes To Quality Life
Today a friend sent me a link to DoNothing, with a picture of a beautiful sunset. A little timer on it said, "do nothing for 2 minutes." A few seconds on the automatic timer had already counted down by the time I thought, "I meditate and do nothing so this will be easy."
A peaceful and exquisitely calm feeling came over me as I felt my breathing deepen. Then I thought, "breathing deep is not doing nothing. I wonder if I am supposed to be focusing on my breathing or really doing nothing."
I tried not think and just breath naturally. Since I was sitting with my eyes closed, I started to think, "I wonder how much time has passed. I wonder if a little bell will ring when the two minutes is finished or if I will just open my eyes and it will have finished. Maybe I won't know how long I have been doing nothing."
So I opened my eyes. Just over one minute had passed. I took a few more seconds to appreciate the beauty of the red and gold sunset on the screen.
One minute had already passed, so I had a sense of how long that had taken. I closed my eyes again. Then started to laugh at the crazy thoughts going through my mind. The next time I opened my eyes, the screen said, "well done." Not a voice, just with words on the screen. There was no bell, just a sense from the universe that I had done a good thing.
That was the first time on my iPhone. The volume was down. I didn't hear the sound of the waves below the sunset.
The second time I listened on my computer only I wasn't really going to do it, I just wanted to share it on Facebook. The timer started just the same. When I went to look for the share button the screen flashed me a message, "failed." When I stopped moving the mouse, the timer started again.
Understanding, I meditated for two more minutes, wondering briefly whether the sound of the waves would stop at the end. They didn't. Life goes on but more wonderfully when we stop to look at a sunset or listen to ocean waves. The world seems brighter now. Two minutes can change the quality of your life.
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If you don't like your life, change it!
Sometimes you can’t help but wonder if all your worst fears about yourself will come true. Like, yes, you will get fat. Not totally obese but just enough for old friends to pity you when they run into you on the street. Just enough for people to seriously wonder if you’re going through a hard time and have turned to excessive eating to ease the pain.
Or maybe you’ll screw up one too many relationships and actually end up alone. It doesn’t seem too far-fetched, does it? If you want to get loved by someone, you have to be out there living life, acting all kinds of lovable. All that stuff about finding The One when you least expect it are lies. The people falling in love have always expected it or, at the very least, wanted it so badly to happen. The people who end up single are the ones that have successfully convinced themselves that they’d like to be alone.
All of these things could happen to you, right? There was a time not too long ago when you believed that the worst-case scenario was very unlikely. You kept it hanging there in the back of your mind only because you had to, because it often motivated you to go in the other, better direction. But then — you don’t know how or when — it changed. The worst-case scenario quickly was starting to look like the only scenario for you.
How?
When did the narrative change?
When did your actions have any kind of permanence?
When did you stop being able to change your luck in the course of a day?
You should be scared. That’s good. That’s what might ultimately save you from leading an unhappy life. Fear either prevents people from moving forward or allows them to keep going after what they want.
Don’t let any of it come true. If you don’t want your life to go in a certain direction, understand that you have the ability to change it. You might already. After all, “understanding something” and “deciding to do something about it” are two entirely different things. It’s amazing how long you can stay paralyzed for, isn’t it?
This might sound weird but it took me a long time to realize that I had control over the course of my life. In fact, I’m still not quite convinced that I’ve realized it completely but at least I know I’m getting there. For so long, I viewed my life as this thing that I could poke and prod like it was a foreign object. I was a baby licking batteries, sticking my fingers in things that I knew could hurt me but I didn’t care. That’s the point: I didn’t care if I got hurt. In my mind, nothing stuck anyway.
Until it did. I think eventually everyone has this moment where they realize that being in charge of your life is the most serious full-time job you’ll ever have. Of course, life immediately becomes less fun when you realize this because you’re old enough to know now that you can get hurt. You know that everything has consequences so you have to consciously live a healthier life which is, for lack of a better word, hard. But, in the end, it’s so much better.
Feeling invincible has its high points. Being naive and stupid and crazy definitely makes for an exciting life but it will burn you out so damn quickly. It will make you feel like the rawest of nerves, crying over silly inconsequential things and never leaving your apartment. Your brain will feel like scrambled eggs, your body like a jellyfish, You know this.
If you don’t like your life, change it. Yes, you’ve heard this adage before and it probably sounded like nails on chalkboard. But perhaps why it’s so annoying is because it’s true. Because you know you’re the one in control here. You might just not be ready to take ownership, which is fine. Everyone’s entitled to a downfall. Just don’t forget to come back up.
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A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery. He answered the call asap, changed his clothes & went directly to the surgery block. He found the boy's father pacing in the hall waiting for the doctor. On seeing him, the dad yelled:
"Why did you take all this time to come? Don't you know that my son's life is in danger? Don't you have any sense of responsibility?"
The doctor smiled & said:
"I am sorry, I wasn't in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after receiving the call...... And now, I wish you'd calm down so that I can do my work"
"Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??" said the father angrily
The doctor smiled again & replied: "I will say what Job said in the Holy Book "From dust we came & to dust we return, blessed be the name of God". Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go & intercede for your son, we will do our best by God's grace"
"Giving advises when we're not concerned is so easy" Murmured the father.
The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy,
"Thank goodness!, your son is saved!" And without waiting for the father's reply he carried on his way running. "If you have any question, ask the nurse!!"
"Why is he so arrogant? He couldn't wait some minutes so that I ask about my son's state" Commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.
The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: "His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son's surgery. And now that he saved your son's life, he left running to finish his son's burial."
Moral - Never judge anyone..... because you never know how their life is and what they're going through"
SPREAD HUMANITY.
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Living as expats for three years, David and Cathy have learned that the most important thing in expat life is to remain open and to be willing to change your mind. "Our children didn't get it at first," Cathy says. "All our kids came around after visiting and seeing our life here in Belize." The Thayers send their family an email update each week, telling them what they've done that week.
Last year, in response to one of the email updates, their daughter wrote to say, "I'm so happy for you guys, for what you've found for yourselves. I hope that sometime in the not-too-distant future I can find something as great for my own life." The support of their children made their new adventure even better. "I have to admit that that made us feel a little proud," Cathy says. "We're having the best time of our lives, and now we also feel like we're blazing a new trail of example for our children."
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This section is presented and dedicated to all the lovers and to our members to use for those "significant others" in their lives.
We truly wish much love and tranquility in your lives.
From our house, to yours with Love!
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I REALLY Care About You
I stopped at my bank last week to deposit a check. I could have used the ATM, but I am so glad that I didn’t because if I had, I probably would not have met Leo.
There were 3 or 4 people ahead of me in the line-up, so knowing that it would take a few minutes, I amused myself by simultaneously watching three different cooking and home improvement shows on three wall mounted TVs. There was no sound of course, so I was reading the captioning on each in turn. I was feeling relaxed, calm, not really focused on anything, just waiting my turn.
Moments passed. Then, directly in front of me, a tiny elder woman, who was now first in line, started toward one of the tellers stations. It was obvious she was intent on getting her business completed quickly, as she moved forward before the customer had quite finished and she had to step back again. Her backward movement caused my attention to be drawn to the customer directly ahead of us. He was facing the counter and from my position behind him, I could see only his white hair and the bright red team jacket that he wore.
I heard him say to the teller in a deep, strong voice… “Have a Great Day!” and the teller, to whom he was speaking replied; “You too Leo – see you next week!”
The impatient woman in front of me, again made her move, heading for the wicket Leo was leaving. So intent was she on her task, that she narrowly avoiding bumping into him. As she passed him Leo looked up, directly at me. His eyes seemed to be completely black, clear, bright and piercing and without a moments hesitation he said to me; “You, are an attractive young lady.” I was so surprised by his statement and struck by the genuine warmth and generosity that filled it, I blurted out “why, thank YOU sir” instantly reaching out to shake his hand, not even realizing that he was walking with a cane.
He managed to not drop the cane as he switched it to his left hand, taking my hand in his warm, dry and firm grip. His eyes never left mine as he spoke again; “I REALLY care about you!” he said. It happened so fast and as he let go of my hand I saw him reach out to the next person in line and say “I REALLY care about you too!”
It barely registered in my mind when I faintly heard the teller to my left say “I can help you here…” As Leo continued down the line greeting each in turn, I dragged myself away to complete my transaction with the young woman who had called me. I was so overcome by his innocent and sincere gift!
Simultaneously humbled and exalted by his innocence and compassion. He was like a gregarious 4 year old, who walks up to anyone and everyone, inviting them to play with him. I wondered to myself afterwards. How has he attained this state of grace? Imagine the wake of warm feelings he leaves behind him as he sails through this world, touching people for just a moment. He dropped a boulder into the placid ocean of my reality that is still rippling outward as you hear and hopefully feel, some of what Leo so unselfishly bequeathed to me, that I attempt to pass on to you.
I REALLY care about you!
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Man's Best ...
Continued...
Bill told him, and the man sighed, "We live in a tiny apartment, and my sister, without asking me, gave Naomi the puppy. After a week, the apartment smelled bad, and he kept going on the carpet, so I dropped him off at the animal shelter. I made a terrible mistake. Naomi cried all night. I went back looking for him the next day, but he was gone." ... bill looked at his sweaty palms and crossed his legs, while the three adults watched Kingston and Naomi play. Then Bill let out a mournful sigh, "Let her have the dog."
"I couldn't possibly do that," the father said, but Bill had already called for the girl. Naomi walked slowly, eyes wide with concern. Kingston ran up wagging his curly tail.
Bill smiled at the girl. "His name is Buddy? I didn't know, so I named him Kingston. Your daddy says that Buddy can come back to live in your house. Will that make you happy?"
Naomi bounced with impatient joy. Happy tears clouded her blue eyes when she hugged Bill and whispered, "Thank you."
Soon after, Kingston licked Bill's face goodbye, and followed Naomi up the ridge on the trail leading to his old home. Bill sighed and stared off into space, when Joan's hand cradled his fingers. She had never done that before. Bill's tentative gaze was quickly soothed by the promise in Joan's smile. "Kingston is gone, but I'll always be here."
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Peace of mind
Whenever I began to clean my bedroom my routine is to turn on my cousin's PS3 and play my music folder (which contains a great variety of artists, might I add) but just a moment ago I grabbed a seat to take a little break and as I was sitting, Chris Botti came on, the song, "Embraceable You" and it relaxed me and I had become so comfortable in my seat that my mind drifted away to a beautiful scene of a moment of mine back in time and right then I said to myself "This is what I love".
I love a peace of mind. I mean, you just can't buy that. I often find myself reveling in the many moments I'm blessed to receive that provides my environment to be at ease. And right now, I'm alone, the house has a wonderful aroma in the air, the music is playing, the door is ajar, the fan is on, the windows are open and the sun is shining so bright that it gives my place the perfect light. Aah!!! I love this feeling!
No one is calling me, knocking at my door and there is no loud hustle and bustle outside. Then I started thinking, Lord, what did I do to deserve this moment? Never mind, I just want to enjoy it. Thank you Lord for allowing me this peaceful feeling of freedom. I hope all that maybe reading this can soon indulge in a mental pleasure such as this. There is nothing like it. Wow!!!
Uh Oh, gotta go . . . someone is at my door. LOL!!! I guess it was fun while it lasted!
Until . . .
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Kane...
Unlikely Messenger
In other words, it became obvious to me, that even with my limited capacity for understanding at the time that Kane was a highly evolved spirit with great wisdom. He was the glue, the heart and soul of the Bouchards at the time. And even if folks weren’t aware of it on an earthly level, there was undeniable evidence of it in the hearts of everyone who came in contact with this child. It’s true. I’m a witness.
Kane demanded attention. But not because of his mobility challenges or other apparent shortcomings. In his mind, he had no challenges or shortcomings. The truth is, he received attention because he was alive and real and had so much to offer. At two he was a legitimate personality to be reckoned with.
Kane was and still is (through his continued influence) a bundle of warm and powerful energy sent to us all so we might learn that love transcends all things. Kane wasn’t aware of what the rest of the world perceived as handicaps. Not at all. Kane was here to engage us all on even ground… a fragile yet feisty baby sent to teach us all an important lesson. And at the age of two he did just that.
Unlike the whiney and inept society we’ve become where accountability is perceived as a shortcoming rather than a virtue, my mom’s family made it clear to Kane that he was okay and was never taught that he was a victim.
Go Speed Racer…
Kane mastered everything presented to him on his own level. For example, he was mobile because of the cart my uncle built for him. But Kane took that mobility to another level and became proficient at hairpin turns, leaving rubber on hardwood floors and wowing spectators with plenty of unexpected and spectacular maneuvers.
Kane wasn’t special because he was physically compromised and attracted pity. No way. Kane was just special. His personality demanded attention. He was the life of the party. It’s hard to think of a two-year old this way, but if you met this kid, you’d want him for a friend because he was alive, with so much to give.
Because of his weakened heart Kane left us not long after my visit. Although expected, his passing was certainly a somber occasion and one of reflection. Sometimes we look at God’s work and wonder why certain things are as they are. I know everyone who had ever met this beautiful boy had to wonder.
I spent only a couple of hours with this child, yet remember and still vividly feel his energy now. And that energy is as powerful today, 30 years after meeting this boy, as it was then. That’s special. Experiencing his influence over his surroundings was amazing. And his memory still touches me often.
I can only imagine that as the parent of a child like Kane one might be filled with anxiety and grief wondering what he or she might have done differently… any small detail that might have produced a different, more positive outcome. But I also believe that God carefully chooses us all for his work and that having a child like Kane is actually a privilege. I think the parents of such special babies are angels too, just as the babies are.
Infinite Wisdom
So I guess God knows what He’s doing. Kane touched everyone in a profound way. His ability to engage anyone along with his refusal to be different has been an inspiration to me. And though I’ve never spoken with his parents or anyone else close to him about this, I’m sure they all realize that he was sent here to show us that it’s all about love. I know my own life would not have been as rich without having met him.
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We have a pit bull
We found him a few weeks ago, walking along the road in a rural area. He was jumping on cars, and we thought maybe his family was camping somewhere nearby, so we passed him by. A few hours later, on our return trip, he was still in the same place, again, trying to get folks to stop for him. When he saw us, he laid down in the middle of the road, so we were unable to get around him.
We stopped the car and looked around for a few minutes, trying to figure out if anyone was around from whom he was separated. It didn't appear so. Then we took a good look at the dog. He had no collar and he was really thin. We decided he was abandoned.
My cousin said, "If he doesn't bite me when I try to pick him up to put him in the car, then we have a new dog." The dog happily joined us with no fight at all. The only thing we were in danger of was getting licked to death. He kept sticking his head between the two front seats and thanking us for picking him up.
The dog was clearly on the road for some time. He was extremely under weight. He was covered in scars and new wounds. We have surmised that some of the scars were from when he was on the road, we are thinking possible fights with coyotes, but he also looks as though he was used for fighting other dogs. We figured his incredibly sweet personality was the reason he was abandoned. He must not have been a good fighting dog.
So, we fed him a lot over the course of the next two weeks and he gained over twenty pounds. We took him to the veterinarian, who said the dog appears to be in good health, despite his having been abandoned. The vet guessed the dog is about two or three years of age, from the condition of his teeth. The vet gave him all the required shots and sent us on our way.
We do love this dog. He has obviously been mistreated and yet, he still is so very sweet. He had no manners, but he is a quick learner. He no longer tries to get on the bed, but he does like sitting in one of the folding chairs. We figure he wishes to avoid being underfoot when our daughter is dancing about, which she does often. She has stepped on him a few times. When that happens, he simply moves. He does not growl or bare his teeth. This is the first pit I've ever been around, so all the stories I have heard over the past few decades make me wonder about their validity.
Since then, he has become a member of our family.
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Life is a Journey
Resting in the cold, stark, waiting room with a Band-Aid covering the vein on my arm, I watched the doctor mumbling words I could not hear to my mom. I assumed the results were in from my latest round of blood tests. It was the third time that week I had been in that waiting room, and I was getting both nervous and scared. No one likes to watch twenty-three vials of blood flowing from their veins. It gives one the feeling that if they are taking that much, there must be something seriously wrong. That is what I thought, and as it turned out, I was right.
Many people say it gets worse before it gets better. In my case that statement held true.
As a young girl, I was always very active. Playing outside in the yard was a favorite of mine, and I always found time to walk with my golf clubs to the driving range. I can remember chasing the ducks that sat by the lake with my brother, not having a care in the world. Virginia is where we lived, and we loved every minute of the hot summer sun, green grass, and fireflies.
As the doctor spoke to my mom, I had so many questions I wanted answered, but was I ready to hear them? What was wrong with me? I should not be going through this at twelve. My thoughts were soon cut short by Dr. Chou’s soft, quiet voice. “You really are in pain aren’t you?” I did not know whether to stay quiet or answer in a way that would seem sarcastic. I can’t even walk up stairs! Of course I’m in pain! “What did the blood tests show?” It was all I could think to say. “Your EPR level, which measures the inflammation in your muscles, is off the charts!” He went on the explain that in a normal person their EPR level is 1 to 20, but when something is wrong, it is much higher. In my case, my level was at a whooping 100! Dr. Chou could not believe it.
When I turned 9, my family decided to take a move out west, and revisit their old community of Silver Lakes in Southern California. It was love at first sight. Two weeks later, we moved into a two-story home right on the golf course. Heaven for my brother and I. We use to hop the fence every chance we got to play as much golf as we could before the ranger spotted us. I think the neighbors called us in every time. My mom became a substitute teacher which quickly led to her homeschooling my brother and I. Apparently she wasn’t fond of the California public school system; however, even as a homeschooled student, you still had to receive a few immunizations for kids my age.
At last, finally someone actually believed I was in pain. Up to that point, my mom just kept thinking my legs hurt so badly because I was experiencing growing pains. My family does not get sick, and if we do there is an unspoken rule to buckle up and tough it out. I learned a long time ago that sympathy in my house is not an option. So for a long time I suffered in silence. To actually have Dr. Chou standing before my mom and I acknowledging I was sick seemed like a dream.
The daydreams started while I listened to him speak words too big for a twelve-year-old to understand. I started wondering if I would be going home that day or if I would become one of the patients I saw passing me on gurneys. I wondered if this is what a hospital feels like when you are one of the patients. At that moment, I did not recognize it as a place for saving a life or giving one, but rather a place to question life. Was I going to sit there and die or fight to stay alive? Obviously, since I am able to write this, you realize I chose to fight. I wanted to figure out what was going wrong with me and fix it. I just did not know how hard it was actually going to be. I did not know then, that things would get worse before they would get better.
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My Barber
At the appointed time on the appointed day, my brothers and I went down to the barber.
Wise. Handsome. Tall. Athletic. Strong, yet with the gentle touch and dexterous hands of a surgeon.
To cut the hair on the far side of my head, he didn’t spin the stool, and he didn’t walk around the chair either. Rather, he snuggled my head over against his chest so he could reach over to the far side, Working from above.
I could hear his breathing. I could feel his breathing.
I could feel his heart.
When the whim struck, he blew away the loose hairs from my neck or face with a burst of his own breath.
Once finished, my barber would stand back, gaze proudly at his work, and then proclaim ‘not bad for an amateur!’
How the years went rushing by!
Looking back past all those years, I wish my dad still cut my hair.
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Three years ago, David and Cathy Thayer moved from northern Idaho to Cayo, Belize. In Idaho, the Thayers had nine months of winter each year. In Cayo, they have 12 months of summertime.
Despite the promise of eternal summer, Cathy did not immediately embrace the prospect of packing up and leaving her U.S. life behind. "When David first got this idea of moving to another country into his head, I humored him," Cathy says. "He'd start talking about moving to a new country, and I'd listen. To his face I'd say, 'Ah, that's interesting, dear.' To everyone else I was saying, 'No way!'"
When her husband came to her with the notion that the couple retire overseas, Cathy hadn't traveled anywhere other than Paris. When David told her he'd bought tickets for them to travel to Belize, she was shocked. "I didn't know anything about Belize at the time, but I knew one thing," she says. "I knew that Central America is nothing like Paris."
However, David realized that if he had any chance of realizing his dream of life in a new country, he needed to get his wife on board. Reluctantly, Cathy agreed to take the trip. "I agreed to travel to Belize because I told myself it'd be a nice vacation. That was the extent of my commitment at first," she says. "However, I have to admit that I found I liked two things about Belize right away. First, I could communicate with everyone, because English is the language here. And, second, it was warm."
Initially, the couple thought they wanted to live on the ocean. But, after two days on Ambergris Caye, one of the Caribbean islands offshore from mainland Belize, David and Cathy realized the beach life wasn't for them.
David suggested they take a look at Cayo as an alternative. "I'm not a jungle girl," Cathy says. "When I think of jungle, I think of snakes and bugs the size of your head." However, she agreed to go see Cayo with David with the condition that if they didn't find a place to live that they both liked within three weeks they would finally give up on the whole idea.
Their last day in Cayo, the day before their return flight to the U.S., David and Cathy walked into a house available for rent, and Cathy knew she'd found the place where she wanted to live. "I knew the minute I walked onto the property," she says. "I could just see myself living there."
The couple has been living in Cayo ever since. Today, Cathy is as enthusiastic about their decision to make the move as her husband. "One of my favorite things about being in Belize are the other expats," Cathy says. "We're all different, quirky in our own ways, but we have one big, important thing in common. We all left home, left the States, to come somewhere completely new. It's no small thing. It's a pretty amazing and cool thing."
"Back in Idaho, I had a fine life, but a small life. I had my work, my home. I had Target. I shopped for entertainment. I was happy, but I had no idea how much I was missing out on," Cathy says. "Making this move has opened up the whole world to me. Now I see how small and fearful my perfectly fine life really was. I was afraid of moving outside my comfort zone, but I didn't even realize it. I made this move for my husband, but I think I'm the one who has really benefited."
Of course, the past three years reinventing their lives from Idaho to Belize have not been without struggle for the Thayers. The two biggest challenges at first were the internet and the roads. However, the couple reports that both of these things have improved dramatically since they've been living in Cayo.
The biggest change for the better has been personal. "The fears I had moving here have been replaced by confidence," Cathy says. "In the beginning, I was afraid of Belize City. Now I travel to Belize City on my own, walk around, shop, speak with people I meet. Belize City doesn't scare me anymore.
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